Well, bartender´s working on a late night shift
Cheap bums and blondes and barmaids on a midnight drift
And the dance band´s playing the same old sling
I´m sinkin´ whiskey and you´re sippin´ fine wine
I don´t know what it is you´re trying to prove
Well, it should be you, but it´s me who can hardly move
And I´ve got my reputation lyin´ on the line
Come on, baby, be a good dog, and
And help the blind

Oh, won´t you carry me home?
Oh, won´t you carry me home?
Oh, won´t you carry me home?

Like a truck, pick me up

You ain´t no lady, but you sure got taste in men
That head of yours has got you by, time and time again
My arms and legs are achin´ and my head´s about to blow
And your back´s been breakin´ and I´d hate to spoil the show
But I just spent next week´s wages and I´m right out of coin
But you want more and it´s half past four, and they want to close the joint
And we can´t afford a taxi, and it´s too late for the bus
But I´ve been told by friends of mine you´re someone I can trust

Carry me home
Oh, won´t you carry me home?
Carry me home

Don´t leave me lying here, in all this beer!

[Solo]

You drank all your booze and half of mine
I´m bleary eyed and you´re waiting for the sunshine to come and kill me
Just like the man who threw me on the floor
Don´t matter, while I´m down here, I might as well try and find the back end door
Excuse me, have you seen it?
It´s about this big
And have you got a plastic bag?
´Cause I´m gonna be sick
I´m dead drunk and heavin´
Hangin´ upside down
And you´re gettin´ up and leavin´
You think I´m gonna drown

Carry me home
Oh, won´t you carry me home? (I need your help)
Carry me home
(Hahahahaha)
Carry me home
Oh, won´t you carry me home?
Carry me home